Video Game movies suck. They just do. Previous to a few nights ago I had never seen a video game movie that didn’t feel like a pale facsimile of something else. I don’t know what it is about the Video Game medium but their intellectual properties rarely transition well.
Double Dragon is a notable exception. Jesus.
Double Dragon, my friend. Double Dragon.
Have you seen Double Dragon? No, really. Have you seen Double Dragon lately? Like this week? Like within the last 48 hours? Well, then you might not have appreciated it properly.
You should go watch Double Dragon and then comeback and we’ll talk about it.
Ok, I’m not assuming that you’ve gone and watched Double Dragon, so we’re going to talk about. Wasn’t it great? Christ, that movie is so fun. It’s the perfect blend of kinetic story telling, amazingly dumb screenplay, and practical effects. Also: Robert Patrick. Jesus. That dude is awesome.
I’m not quite sure how I missed this film, being a child of the 1990’s. I mean this was right in my wheel house. Bright colors, video games, and ridicules cargo pants. Man, everybody loved cargo pants. What was with that?
Double Dragon is everything the Super Mario Brother movie wanted to be. It’s bombastic, it’s fun, it’s in your face, it’s high concept, and it’s exactly what it should be. This film typifies what it means to take the audience on a roller coaster ride. And without the obnoxious omnipresent CGI that we’re currently inundated with. I felt like I was 12 years old the entire time I was watching the film. It had a great cast, young and cool protagonists, a great emphasis on diversity and reversing archetypical ethnic stereos.
I mean the Fu Man Chu character is a white dude, for crying out loud. How great is that? Great, that’s how great.
I have a complete and unabashed love for this film. I make no disclaimers or qualifier. I think Double Dragon might be the perfect video game movie. C’mon, Mortal Kombat Reboot. Let’s get on board with the amazing quality and tone of Double Dragon.
Also: Robert Patrick needs more roles.
And why was there never a sequel to this amazing film? Highlander got like 30 and none of them are any good. This film was amazing and … Mark Dacoscos’ career nosedived into being a food presenter.
The world we live in is strange, friends. Strange indeed.